FROM PLAYER TO COACH: MEETING THE RIGHT ONE AT THE ALTAR

BY REV. M. G. RAMEY

I know that I’m going to start more than a few arguments in the present, but I hope to save more than a few sleepless nights. Bottom line on male/female relationships in terms of marriage? Man proposes and woman either accepts or rejects. That’s how God set it up and it’s the best way to go. It still works.

We are living at an age where relationships are not being examined ‘after careful research’. This is the era of the hook-up. Relationships–especially marriages–are viewed as disposable. More effort is put forth to hire someone for a job, rather than the checking out of a potential mate with whom you will be with for the rest of your life.

Let’s be honest. I’ve seen more than a few companies ruined and ministries destroyed because a man did not check out the woman to whom he chose to say: “I do”. Due to his inattention to detail, he wound up with a woman who really meant: “I, shrew”. The wake of marital unhappiness spread out like a tsunami: envy, mistrust, jealousy. Few rarely survive when this tidal wave of misery races to a final destination.

The converse has also been proven. I’ve seen more than a few homes destroyed, careers ruined, juvenile detention centers filed and therapists kept busy because a woman didn’t bother to thoroughly examine the man whom she was going to marry. Her life was sunk, because she married a punk AND a drunk!

The Lord provided men and women with two things for marital happiness. The first was His Word: Marriage is covered extensively within the Bible. Secondly, he gave men and women each a brain! Why? To carefully examine that man, or that woman whom you are going to welded to, and wedded to. Long engagements generally yield fewer divorces. Why? Because they are fact finding, not ‘hook up’ motivated.

An old school song sums it up well: “You Can’t Hurry Love”. To put it simply, it is best to check her or him out extensively, otherwise you’ll keep on paying for your error for years to come. Solid marriages start with solid individuals. If you see cracks in your potential mate that can not or will not be resolved before the wedding day, be honest, be truthful, and be gone! Your friends and employers with admire your stand.